Curative Kink: Survivors of Early Abuse Transform Trauma Through BDSM

Cascalheira, Ijebor, Salkowitz, Hitter and Boyce author this article published in 2021 which analyzes the experiences of 20 participants from 5 different countries. The authors generated 6 separate themes that they located in the participants experiences which include: "cultural context of healing, restructuring the self-concept, liberation through relationship, reclaiming power, repurposing behaviours, and redefining pain." In order to create context, this paper cites another study done by Hughs and Hammock in 2020 that found 19% of kink identifying people link their kink to past trauma. Furthermore the authors quote another study by Brown et al. from 2020 that found around 20% of the western population identifies as kinky. 

The cultural context of healing includes many aspects of the kink experience including kink concurrent therapy, stigma, and the kink community culture itself. Some therapists were able to provide supportive therapy to individuals who were attempting healing through kink. Others found therapists to not be supportive, but, if they decided to disclose, some were still able to salvage lessons from the work they did in therapy. Stigma kept many individuals from being open about their kinky activity, yet those that were able to share and find support within the kink community were able to work their their own internalized stigma. BDSM guidelines including consent, scene negotiation, safe-words, aftercare, and other cornerstones allow for individual members to experience a level of safety and comfort that can lead to a culture of healing.

Restructuring self-concept: The article noted that everyone involved in the study was able to strengthen affirming self-concepts that had been distorted by abuse. Following scenes, many participants felt more confident about themselves at a level deeper than the physical and these benefits extended into other aspects of their lives. Former stories were able to shift into empowering narratives about their identity.

Liberation through relationship: Almost every participant experienced increased connectedness in their relationships. In community, tools to communicate are shared and opportunities to practice stating needs and boundaries are plentyful. Individual's found themselves having more opportunity for sharing parts of themselves that were formerly obscured for safety. The opportunity to be 'witnessed' was a powerful healing tool for about a quarter of participants.

Reclaiming power: Several participants were learned the ability to exercise boundaries over their bodily autonomy, something that they did not grow up experiencing. Alternative to the word 'no' gave a participant flexibility to express the same concept with language that did not carry as much weight for them. The inversion of power by either taking on a dominant role in play or by making the choice to give up power through submission allowed participants to feel like exchanging power was a decision they could make and also change at any point.

Repurposing behaviours: Participants found that through gradually exposing themselves to known triggers of abuse that they were able to rewire their brains so that the associations lessened and no longer cause panic or other extreme repercussions. One participant recommends starting with an innocuous behaviour and slowly introducing more and more discomfort. Kink scenes seemed to allow individuals to feel relaxed and become more resilient through purposefully tackling difficult emotions. Through focusing on the pleasure of the activities participants engaged in, they were further able to reorient themselves in the midst of traumatic re-experiencing.

Reimagining pain: Half of the participants found relief through pain play, some of them giving pain and others receiving. One participant notes that the pain of humiliation is her particular kink and is able to find safe ways to experience this emotional state. Another individual notes that pain teaches you how to care for yourself. In all instances, individuals learned more about their relationship with pain and how to better navigate it.

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