A Kinky Household

What does the word kink actually mean?

It is my personal interpretation that kink is sort of an umbrella term that encompasses alternative sexualities. But this is the point, when you try to define something in order to understand it then you simplify it and lose something in the process. Because I currently have a partner that I don't have sex with and I would consider our relationship kinky. We talk about sex often, but not with each other. We interact with our bodies, but there is no sexual energy to it.
Some people consider polyamory, or ethical non-monogamy (ENM), to be kinky. Some ENM folks would not identify with the term 'kinky'. The academic literature has recently been trying to define kink in order to study it and become more inclusive. There's a lot of effort to educate cousellors in order to better serve this population. 
Inevitably there are inexhaustable ways in which we are biased, even against ourselves. I recently asked a partner if his intention was to have a threesome with both me and his other girl. In the process I didn't even realize until he said,"That would be nice, but not really." that I realized I was objectifying myself. Why would I assume that I would even want to have sex with this stranger?
So, in summary, my personal definition of kinky is when folks think outside of the box about their relationships. When they are open to and value the variety of possiblities that we are offered in this life. We can have great conversations, great cuddling, great impact play, great eye contact, great butterflies in our guts with so many people and they are all a gift.

So, I recently moved into a queer, kinky, and polyamorous sex positive household. This is a new experience for me entirely and, in fact, I didn't know such a thing even existed. I felt welcomed by the sounds of a women moaning in pleasure as I made my way up the steps to my apartment. As it should be! I thought to myself. I felt and continue to feel at home. As I approach the house each time I say to myself, "almost home." and it feels extraordinary.
After moving in one of my roommates shared about a fem orgy that they had organized the past summer. I was intrigued! She described some of the activities they engaged in and one of them reminded me of the late Betty Dodson's work on normalizing vulvas. Check some of her work out at:
She is amazing!
As a result of my roommates beautiful share, my mind was opened to possibility. The good Betty's spirit surely entered me and in response to a (requested for) dick pic from a new lover, I texted back 'why don't people request vulva pics?". Then I asked him if we would be willing to receive a video if I created one that educated him on how I like my vulva to be touched. This escalated into me creating a second video where I demonstrated while explaining how I like to edge myself.

This is all pretty kinky to me. It doesn't involve any impact play, as some might have thought, yet it is certainly outside of the box I would say.

Can't wait to see what happens next!

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